Day Twenty Seven- Romans 8:28

"And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love the Lord." Romans 8:28 (emphasis mine.)

Everything! Everything! Not just some things, not just a few things, and not just the things we think He will! Everything! The deeper my love relationship with the Lord grows, the more I realize and appreciate this beautiful, merciful fact. It became very clear to me just a few weeks ago, that even deep dark secrets of my past can be used for God's glory. Pain that now, even on a small scale still hurts. I have always been very self-conscious of my weight (even before having a weight problem.) My heightened sense of my weight caused me to do some very irrational and unhealthy things over the years, especially as a teen. I remember often hiding behind coats, make-up and "big hair." Although I will hit a milestone in 2011 (turning 40) I remember vividly the pain of growing up as someone who was inflicted by low self-esteem due to her weight. So much so, that an evening high school basketball game, and a remark from a fellow classmate often haunts me to this day. Sitting in the bleachers with my "big hair" and excessive make-up (which by some standards, I still wear! Just very proudly these days, and making no excuses for it!) and wearing a coat, so my weight wouldn't be exposed (I'm not sure what I thought a big black coat was going to do for my figure!), I overheard one classmate remark to another, "She looks like a white Oprah!" (Sorry, Oprah, I'm pretty sure it wasn't meant to be a compliment!) As you can imagine, I simply wanted to curl up, crawl under the proverbial rock and disappear. A comment that did nothing but fuel a teenager's desire to partake in a vicous cycle of bingeing, purging, and numerous other unhealthy habits for years has now become yet another beautiful, growing part of my testimony! A testimony, that I had the opportunity to share just a few short weeks ago. Speaking to a group of young men and women, I was asked to simply share the gospel in any way I saw fit. Up until this moment I had shared this teenage experience with a select few (some of which were NOT my husband, and children.) On this evening, as my husband stood off to my left and my children sat in the audience, I felt it necessary to share my dark secret, and reveal to this special audience, that at times, experiences we have that appear only to cause hurt, and pain, can and will work for God's glory if we will let them. The sheer pain (physical pain it seemed at the time), of that Friday night basketball game, doesn't hold the sting that it used to. I praise God, that He took something so ugly and painful and has now made it beautiful, and wonderful! Not knowing the impact of what I shared with that sweet group of teens and young children, I was in our local grocery store less than one week after speaking. As I was paying for my groceries, I overheard someone say, "I really liked your talk the other night..." As I looked up, I saw a young male cashier just a few aisles over..."Thank you, it was my pleasure." And, as I left the store, I looked up, thanking God for His beauty, mercy and lessons in life. Lessons, that I times, I wish I did not have to take, but know they are working to build His Kingdom! And that, is of course what I am here for!
May God bless your day, by revealing to you that a hurt or pain in your life is or will be deeply transformed to grow you closer to Him and it will work out! All for His glory!
Thanks for reading!
Love,
Julie